I'm Finally a Billionaire

Actually a Billionaire and a Trillionaire. I have in my possession two legal bills (real money); one for 50 Trillion Dollars (50,000,000,000,000)and the other for 50 Billion Dollars. I have copies of them below. Wait, wait! These are Zimbabwean dollars, worth next to 50 cents or so. So, I am a Zim Millionaire, like every citizen of Zimbabwe.

The southern African country battled the world's highest inflation rate, officially put at 231 million percent. In lay terms, something you bought on or about January 1st for 1 dollar was worth 231 million by the end of the year. It’s a lot better now after the Zimbabwean government accepted to use the ol’ Greenback (U.S Dollar) as legal currency.

Home Alone: It’s not as Fun as it Sounds!

Three days down, twenty five more to go, and I’m thinking: This is real torture. No one needs water boarding with me; all is needed is to keep my family away from me and I’ll confess to anything they want me to.

As Radhia and the girls left for Yemen on Thursday afternoon they waved goodbye to me and Hamza, and I bit my lips as tears welled up in my eyes. “I miss them already and they haven’t even left yet! How am I going to tolerate four weeks without them?” I looked away from Hamza, uncomfortable with this intense display of emotion, and kept a fake smile plastered to my face. But the pain was excruciating, building up in stages since the early hours of the morning, and getting worse with each passing minute.

I drove back home and although the rain had not started yet, the sky was a troubled gray. The environment was almost as gloomy as I was. It was extremely hard not to give in to the loneliness and feel sorry for myself. Back home, I experienced nothing, thought nothing and felt nothing except how much I miss them. The solace I searched in my hope to accomplish some work vanished rapidly. My thoughts were in fragments I could hardly piece together. I stewed myself into a state of concentrated sadness. Leaning back in my “regular” seat in the family room and vaguely listening to the garbled noises of television in the background, I felt a persistent, icy dread at the thought of Amat’s illness, Ruqi’s looming departure, and at the lack of the beautiful sounds that usually permeate our lovely home. Zainab and Sumi quarrelling over mundane issues, Selma giggling until her nostrils flare and her eyes fill up with tears, and Radhia’s breath warm and moist, with the rattle of sleep in it as we watch our favorite television shows.

I went to bed alone with complete silence engulfing the entire house. I threw Radhia a good night kiss over my shoulder and said a little prayer for all of them, and then I stared scornfully at the ceiling. I can’t take another four weeks of this.

END QUOTE: Do not take life so seriously. You will never get out of it alive. --Ebert Hubbard